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Need God's Answer and Help Now

I need God to tell me if I'm still married to my wife who left me in 08. We have been separated for 5 yrs. She wanted a divorce but has never filed on me, She wont reconcile because of my failure to be the man of God during our 14 years of marriage. our 2 kids pray for God to bring us back together. We live 10 minutes apart and still talk, but she has a wall built, there's no connection , this marriage is broken, don't even know if I'm still married. We are living like we are divorced. need prayers. need God to show me tell me what I'm supposed to do. Most Christians tell me to divorce her and I've tried 4x and it never succeeded. PLEASE GOD TELL ME WHAT TO DO. Its been 5 years. HELP! *I'm doing the MORT FERTELS MARRIAGE FITNESS BOOTCAMP its my last try to help save my marriage, asking God to use this...its so difficult when you have an OBSTINATE SPOUSE< PLEASE PRAY for us